From a lawyer at work:
Dear Katz Cradle,
My name is Mr. Fall. I am an attorney who has been retained by your cats who are alleging various forms of mistreatment, including, but not limited to, negligent placement of food bowls.
It appears in violation of Florida Statute 22 FL1259 that you are failing to provide safe eating accommodations for my clients. It further appears that my clients are suffering from continued instances of assault, particularly with fingers in the ears and eyes. One of my clients is being treated for whip lash as a result of having to escape the hostile environment created by one hereinafter known as Abigail. My clients further allege disparate treatment in the allocation and distribution of juvenile training devices. Finally, my clients are experiencing emotional distress from the preferential treatment given to Ms. Abigail. We allege that if my clients were to eat in the manner displayed by Ms. Abigail, they would be subject to severe disciplinary retribution. To preclude extended and costly litigation, my clients are willing to provide you one additional opportunity to correct the situation prior to litigation.
Slip N. Fall, Attorney at Law
In our defense, the cats get to eat everything that Abby drops on the floor. Lawyers...
1 comment:
If it would amuse the counsel, I would like to offer Sprite as a character witness for Miss Abigail's defense to show what an upstanding (and upright) toddler she really is. Although questioning Sprite's dogs may discredit the witness.
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